Rebound relationships can be very dangerous

But what is a rebound relationship?

Rebound relationships can be tricky, and frankly, they can be very dangerous. But what exactly is a rebound relationship? In simple terms, it’s when someone jumps into a new romantic relationship shortly after ending a previous one, often before they’ve had time to heal emotionally. This can happen intentionally or unintentionally, but the result is usually the same: emotional confusion and potential heartache.

To put it briefly, a rebound relationship is when someone who has recently ended a romantic relationship gets involved with someone else very quickly, despite not being emotionally healed from the previous breakup.

Jumping into a rebound relationship can happen almost immediately after a breakup. Being in a new relationship can feel exciting and thrilling. Some people may even intentionally seek out a new partner to distract themselves or to try and feel better, while others might “fall” into one without realising it. People seek rebound relationships for many reasons, and as no two people are the same, their motivations can vary widely.

For some, a rebound relationship is a way to avoid dealing with the negative emotions that come with a breakup—sadness, hurt, anger, guilt, and sometimes even shame. These feelings can be overwhelming, and not everyone is ready to face them head-on.

Rebound relationships are often brief and emotionally confusing. Those involved may be unsure of what they truly want, as they’re still heavily tied to their past relationship. While most people find themselves in rebound relationships unconsciously, sometimes it’s a very intentional choice.

Why did we get into one?

Because our last relationship ended

Because our last relationship ended.

Trying to end a relationship is hard, but it’s important to do it the right way. When a relationship ends, some people try to ignore the painful feelings left behind by jumping into something thrilling, exciting, and mind-numbing.

Unfortunately, many of these new relationships run into problems. Why? Because the negative emotions from the past relationship are often left unaddressed. Instead of healing, people carry their unhealed selves into the next relationship—and sometimes, from one relationship to another.

For some, rebound relationships are a way to win back an ex. They hope their former partner will see them with someone new and feel jealous. But let’s be honest—this rarely works, especially if it was the ex who ended things in the first place.

So, how can you know if you’re in a rebound relationship? And what can you do to avoid falling into one?

Warning signs of a rebound relationship

This list isn’t exhaustive, but take notice if several of these points fit your situation:

• The relationship is moving too fast or feels rushed.
• You or they got out of a serious relationship very recently.
• They or you talk about your or their ex all the time—or, on the flip side, avoid mentioning them completely.
• You or they don’t want to show emotions.
• Most of your time together is oriented around physical intimacy.

More signs you’re in a rebound

• They’re giving you mixed signals.
• It seems like they mostly like you for the attention you give them.
• They want to show you off to others—or even seem to want their ex to find out about you.
• They don’t include you in their close inner circle of family and friends.
• They avoid committing to any long-term plans with you.
• The relationship feels short-lived or unstable.

In some cases, a rebound relationship can even be dangerous. Like the one that left me with brain damage.

How long does a rebound relationship usually last

Rebound relationships don’t usually last long—and for good reason. Heartbroken people often seek them out as a quick fix to fill the void left by their previous relationship. They’re looking for fun, excitement, and a temporary escape from the pain of a breakup. Let’s face it: breakups are no fun, and the difficult emotions that come with them can feel overwhelming. It’s no wonder people try to block out those thoughts.

Rebound relationships tend to be short-lived because they’re not built on genuine interest in the new person. Instead, they’re based on the desire to feel good again. But here’s the problem: you can’t build a healthy new relationship when you’re still carrying emotional baggage from your past.

Breakups bring up a whirlwind of emotions—sadness, anger, guilt, and sometimes even vindictiveness. It’s not uncommon to replay the relationship over and over in your mind, feel depressed, or struggle to process the hurt. These unresolved feelings can make it nearly impossible for a new relationship to survive.

Can a rebound relationship be healthy?

Let’s be honest—no one is perfect, and not everyone has to be 100% healed to start a new relationship. For some, a rebound relationship might simply be about finding someone to have fun with, get attention from, or temporarily fill the gaps left by their previous partner.

So, yes, rebound relationships can be healthy—but this is rare. The key thing to remember is that if you’re not completely over your ex, it can be incredibly difficult to form healthy emotional attachments. Without addressing the unresolved feelings from your past, a new relationship is likely to struggle.

Takeaway

Work on yourself

I mean it—work on yourself. Physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Take the time to figure out who you want to be in your next relationship and how you deserve to be treated.

Remember, it’s your life and your dreams. If you want to follow your dreams, you have to be the one to take the first step. But start when it suits you—there’s no need to rush.

How Can a Supportive Partner Help?

What does a supportive partner look like to you? How should they act towards you? And most importantly, what will truly make you happy?

Remember, this is your life and your dreams. If you want to follow your dreams, you have to be the one to take the first step. But start when it feels right for you—there’s no rush.

Whether you’ve just had a breakup or you’re on the receiving end of a rebound relationship, it’s crucial to recognise the signs. Ask yourself: is this relationship making me truly happy, or am I setting myself up for the same heartache all over again? Be careful about the “boat” you end up in—you don’t want to find yourself in a situation that leaves you with lasting damage.

If you think you’re in danger—emotionally or otherwise—don’t hesitate to seek help. Your well-being comes first.

I suggest reading some of these great books

Recommended Reading for Healing and Growth

If you’re looking for guidance, here are some books that might help:

• A book to help you recognise and deal with manipulation tactics from toxic people: The Highly Sensitive Person’s Guide to Dealing with Toxic People by Shahida Arabi MA.

• A book about why we find change so difficult: The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt.

• A book to help you change your habits: Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones by James Clear.

• A book that uses science to help us change: Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Joe Dispenza.

• A book to help you recover from a narcissistic parent: Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Dr. Karyl McBride Ph.D.

• A book to give you strength when dealing with a narcissistic person: Highly Sensitive Empaths and Narcissists by Victor Murphy.