Narcissists 

Narcissists love to give, just so they can receive. 

Narcissists are interesting characters. Sometimes you can spot them. Sometimes you can not. You may even have to look outside the box. The box they may have put you in.

Narcissists truly believe they are brilliant, caring and helpful in all that they do. They love to write about the good they do, as much as they love to tell you all the good they do. 

This is because they want you to believe they are what they believe they are.

They will turn on their charm and charisma and do all they can to keep people’s focus on their facade. 

A true narcissist is different to an individual with high self-esteem. High self-esteem usually does not mean you need to control people or places. High self-esteem is more a satisfaction with one’s self.

Whereas a narcissist loves to control a person’s response to them, usually with a heavy hand or sometimes the law.

Narcissists – what do they give?

What do they take?

Photo by Austin Distel on Unsplash

Have you ever spent time with a narcissist? If you have you will usually leave feeling exhausted, and sometimes even violated.

Narcissists are like energy vampires, they suck all the energy in the room and encroach on your emotional and mental space.

They usually can not engage in normal conversations which involve give and take. This is because the focus has to be on them. They have to gain attention and control. 

They may set up group meetings and groom people to make themselves seem caring in the community.

They can create fundraisers, and write about all the good they are doing in the community. But they are only doing good for themselves. 

So before donating any money, you should be asking yourself where does this money go?

The gift to you is a gift to themselves

Photo by Kira auf der Heide on Unsplash

Narcissists do not give to you or others for simple kindness. They are investing in their desires. Not the desire to help or please others. It is all about their desire.

By giving gifts they maintain a relationship with you, enabling them to control you.

You do not get gifts from a narcissist because they think you are amazing. You get gifts because they want you to think THEY are amazing.

It is normal to want to show love and affection to others with nice gifts. To thank others, treat others and help others.

It is nice to treat friends to a nice meal or a drink. But we do not do that to foment obligation or obedience. We do that to be nice.

Narcissists give gifts and money to continue the game they are playing.

Good people are encouraged to give until it hurts but narcissists give because it hurts people.

There is a growing sense that narcissism is on the rise around the world.

Sadly, mainly among young people. Although most psychological research does not support that notion, yet. You can see it for yourself.

There are also growing cases of some form of psychosis. 

Takeaway

To a narcissist, the pain of losing their audience drives them to despair. 

They do all this sucking up and making themselves look good.  Only to keep their admiration for themselves flowing.

• Stay Calm and Composed when dealing with a narcissist

Narcissists often try to provoke emotional reactions to gain a sense of control over you. They may resort to manipulation lies, or personal attacks to get a rise out of you. Though it can be difficult, try your best to stay calm and composed when you’re dealing with them, to avoid giving them control over you.

• Keep Your Responses Brief

When you interact with a narcissist, keep your explanations as short and to the point as possible. Narcissists often use whatever information you provide them so they can gaslight you. They will confuse you and make you feel like the crazy one. So, responding as briefly as possible is best.